You've Got a Lot to Learn in the Ways of Me

You came back today. I was really happy about it. Too happy actually. I know you’re mad I dropped calc but I had to do it. And what was this about you trying to kiss me? Several times? I don’t remember that happening. But I will if you try to again tomorrow. Which is stupid. But I can’t help it. Something about you draws me in. I can’t think straight around you. You have this power over me that I want to break free from. So why can’t I?

And music was horrible. I was ignored almost the whole time. It’s funny how completely insignificant I am to everyone. Is that how I am with everyone? It would seem that way. No Name and Name are so…judgmental and intimidating when they’re together. I feel so uncomfortable. I feel like No Name has turned Name against me, even though the two of us were never really good friends. It’s just that now it seems like Name completely hates me. And No Name is a snot to me when Name’s around. And today Name kissed No Name so…intimately. It seemed that way anyways. But I had to move away. It made me feel so uncomfortable. I imagine people felt that same way when Andrew kissed me. Though it was a lot less intimate. Just rude and tacky I think.

I wish I could find myself again. I feel so incredibly lost. And out of control. What can I do to get my life back on track?